Fear helps you to survive

Today I want to talk to you about a book that made a big impression on me, and on many others.

Conversations with God eventually became a whole series of books, written by Neale Donald Walsch.
At the time, Walsch had hit rock bottom. Nothing in his life seemed to be working. One day, out of pure despair, he started writing a letter to God, asking why all of this was happening to him. Suddenly, answers began to come through his writing — a kind of dialogue between him and God (or the universe, or whatever you want to call it).

The core message of his first book was something I had never consciously thought about before (we’re talking more than 30 years ago 😉).

We live from two sides of the same coin: love or fear.

This isn’t about emotions. It’s not about being nice, or about simply being afraid.

It’s about whether your nervous system feels safe.
Because the one and only purpose of your body, as a human being here on Earth, is survival, to stay alive.
Your brain, hormones, muscles, nervous system — in short, your entire body — are doing everything they can to keep you alive, consciously, but mostly unconsciously.

Fear, according to Walsch, is the state in which your inner system believes:

I need to adapt in order to stay safe.

Maybe not because there is danger right now, but because your body once learned that adapting created safety.

That’s why fear can be so big, so overwhelmingly present.

Through your upbringing, through life, you may have learned to:

• Always want to please
• Take responsibility for how everyone else feels
• Always be available
• Work hard
• Avoid being a burden

At some point, that no longer feels like fear.
It just feels like who you are.

Until you notice how much energy it takes.

One of my clients described it like this:

“It was my mother who was afraid of everything and warned me about everything. I know that, and I know I don’t have to be afraid of everything, but I can’t get her voice out of my head. I literally have to tell myself every time: I can go outside without a coat, I can check for myself if a car is coming before I cross the street, I can decide for myself whether that other job is right for me — but my goodness, I keep hearing her voice in my head.”

Fear is not a character trait.

It’s an old survival mechanism that is still active.

And that’s why it’s so hard to recognise.

It’s time to listen to yourself.