Your Body Often Responds Before Your Mind Does
(Part 4 of the Language of the body series)
We often assume that we first need to understand something and only then can feel it.
That we have to analyse a situation, so we can draw a conclusion, and then notice the emotional or physical impact it has on us.
But in reality, it often works the other way around.
Your body frequently responds before your mind catches up.
It's time for a few examples.
But first, a disclaimer.
Every person is different. Every person has had a different upbringing, different experiences, and different ways of learning to navigate life. Even children raised in the same family can develop very different responses.
So the examples I'm sharing here are just that: examples.
You may recognise yourself in them completely, partially, or not at all.
Let’s start with some examples you might recognise.
You walk into a room and immediately sense that something has happened, even before anyone says a word.
Your stomach feels unsettled because you know you have a difficult conversation later that day.
You reach the end of the day feeling exhausted, despite the fact that you haven't done anything physically demanding. As if sitting behind a computer all day, thinking, planning, solving problems, and making decisions doesn't require energy.
The example of the tense shoulders
This is probably one of the most recognisable examples.
Many people have no idea how much tension they are holding until someone says: "Relax your shoulders. They're practically touching your ears."
In Greek mythology, Atlas carries the world on his shoulders. Sometimes it feels as though we do the same.
Many high-functioning women carry the weight of their work, family, responsibilities, and endless to-do lists on their shoulders.
Not just in a practical sense. Especially the schedules, the children, the household, the shopping, the work commitments.
But there is also the invisible mental load. The constant scanning.
Did I remember everything? Has everyone thought about this? Is everything going to be okay?
Without even realising it, you may be holding that tension in your neck and shoulders.
Of course, there can be practical explanations too. Poor posture. Too much time behind a screen. Too little movement. Not everything needs a deeper interpretation.
But shoulder tension tells me something about how long your system has been operating in a state of alertness.
The example of an upset stomach
Your mind may tell you that you're perfectly fine with something, but your stomach may have a different opinion.
It feels unsettled.
Tight.
Nauseous.
Bloated.
Or perhaps your digestion becomes unpredictable.
Again, this isn't always emotional. But it is worth remembering that the nervous system and the digestive system are closely connected.
For many people, stress shows up in the gut long before it becomes a conscious thought.
We all know the feeling of butterflies in our stomach which feels fun and exciting.
But anxiety, uncertainty, worry, or distrust can show up there too. As nausea, constipation or diarrhoea.
Perhaps your stomach isn't being difficult.
Perhaps your system is responding more quickly than your thinking mind.
The example of the heart and head connection
The American HeartMath Institute has done research where beautiful and terrible pictures were shown randomly at people. Through all the measurements they did it was possible to notice that the heart responded a fraction of a millisecond earlier than the head.
Incredible not?
My own example: stomach problems
Years ago, I suddenly developed stomach problems. It kept me awake at night. It was strange because I had never experienced stomach issues before.
So, being practical, I started with the obvious questions.
Had I eaten something that didn't agree with me?
Was I ill? Did I have a virus?
Should I have it checked?
But none of those explanations seemed to fit.
Then I realised I needed to ask myself a different question:
What might I be struggling to digest right now?
Because that is what the stomach does: digest.
Honestly, I couldn't think of anything.
Until I spoke with my husband.
During that conversation, I discovered that there were things happening within his family that I hadn't known about, but had somehow picked up on nonetheless. I felt left out and that didn’t go well with me. I couldn’t digest what was happening.
And after that conversation, something shifted. My symptoms disappeared.
Does that mean every stomach complaint is emotional? Of course not.
Life is rarely that simple.
But for me, it was a powerful reminder that there is often a connection between the body, stress, and emotions.
Related articles from the Language of your body Library:
- Symptoms rarely appear out of nowhere
- What people pleasing does to your body (Published September 8)
- Why your mind won’t switch off (Published September 15)
- Being strong is not the same as being balanced (Published September 22)
- What your body really needs (Published September 29)
